I am getting ready to start addressing the issue of labels on ds's toys with the in-laws. I don't want character toys/books in the house for him or religious toys/books. Is it right and within my limits for me to request the same with the toys they have for him at their house (regarding what they buy specifically for him)? What has your experience been with explaining your no logo policy with your family members who aren’t media savvy? How can I keep it simple for them without sounding like an over-protective parent (which they probably will think)? Dh is pretty ambivalent about this but he understands where I’m coming from and will support me. Unfortunately, he has no advice to offer and right now I have no friends with kids to ask – except my hip mama friends!
This afternoon, my son and I had a blast playing on the front porch with a big pot of water, a few cups and a clean kitchen sponge. We were just goofing around trying to stay cool -- splashing each other, squeezing the sponge over each others' heads, pouring water from cup to cup. Later our friends came over for dinner. Mind you, I really like these friends a lot, and their daughter and my son are very close, in their little toddler way. But the friends' house is filled with every conceivable plastic toy, and the pace of life there is much faster & louder than at our house. (The child has a ball pit, for pete's sake.) So after dinner, the kids started playing together on the porch. There were squeals of delight as they splashed each other, made it "rain," and climbed into the pot! As they were leaving, my (adult) friend said, "I never imagined they could have so much fun with a pot of water and some cups."
xposted to my parenting groups
I am a 37-year-old mother of a glorious 16-month-old son. I come from a family of bathroom cryers; any "negative" emotion was hidden and disposed of in private, and grievances were rarely aired and discussed with the person they concerned. (More likely we'd, say, tell mom about what sister did that made us mad. I call it gathering an army.) As a result I don't know how to handle anger with my son. I want to create a more authentic emotional environment for him than I had growing up, and to give him the space to feel what he feels and talk it through. That depends, though, on being able to verbalize what's bothering you, and of course at his age, he cannot yet do that. So that's my question about *his* anger.
Then there's the question about *mine*.
I find, particularly as we're entering the toddler stage, that I am sometimes short-tempered with him, and that I don't know how to handle it. I sometimes have an explosive temper, which manifests itself in yelling and foul language, and sometimes jumping around. (Yes, it's true, I get hopping mad!) I hasten to add that I have *never* hit him or otherwise been violent toward him.
When my anger is toward a behavior of his that is not appropriate (kicking, grabbing, etc.) I first try to redirect his action. "Please use your feet to walk or to kick a soccer ball, not to kick a person. Nobody likes to be kicked." Then I might try to extricate him from the situation by picking him up and engaging him in something else. Failing that, though, I sometimes get mad and yell. I know he's not scared of me, because he mainly thinks it's funny when I get upset. (I'm sure I look ridiculous.)
I want to teach that everyone feels emotions and it's ok to express them. AND I want to teach that there are healthy ways of expressing them that don't hurt people. And yet I never quite learned those lessons in my bones...
Any thoughts or feedback?
Hey Everyone! My name is Natalie, and I am mom to a littel girl, almost 3, and am 26 weeks pregnant with a boy. Just wanted to find some friends who know and understand the life and worries and priorities of parenthood.
In the past two days, my little guy who just turned one the end of October, has gotten out of his crib. What do I do? I put a gate in the doorway, but he is way too little to be wandering around his room in the middle of the night.
Does anyone have any suggestions?
My daughter is 3 and a half. She seems to be really in a state of change. Some mornings, she's very "big kid" -- she wants to pour her own cereal and milk, clean up the table afterwards, choose her own clothes, etc. Other mornings, she wants me to carry her downstairs, and whines for a teether from the freezer (even though I really don't think she's teething). Some evenings, she wants to cut her own food, but other nights, she wants to be spoonfed.
I'm trying to let her have her own feelings, while also setting consistent limits about what I will and will not do for her. I can't carry her for more than a minute, because she's over 40 pounds and I risk throwing my back out. I ask her to use words, and say please, to get what she wants. I try hard not to reward whining, while also supporting her when she really seems to be honestly struggling to find words for what she wants. I'll propose two alternative things that she could say to me, when she's whining, for instance.
It's just really wearing on me, and I could use some support from folks who have gone through this stage. Advice would be welcome too...